What most people don’t realize is that time is personal to everyone. Time is your own.
I had a discussion with a friend last night about time. About how there is so much judgement around this idea of time. The kicker? Time isn’t even a tangible thing, yet we are expected to use it in a certain way.
We are judged by our time. We are judged by smaller things, like the amount of time it takes for us to get ready in the morning, how long we have been in a certain sport, or the amount of time spent each week on homework.
We are also judged by more significant things. “They said they loved each other after 3 months.” “They had to go to school 2 extra years to get a degree.” “Why would that person start a family so young?” “How long did they even stay at that job?”
I’m sure you’ve heard judgements such as these, as well as many, many, MANY more. I’m not perfect, I have caught myself doing this as well, until I came to a realization.
Since when did anyone make the rules on how people spend their time? Is there a step-by-step guide that we are all missing?
If that’s the case, judge me.
- I didn’t feel comfortable sleeping at friends houses until the 8th grade.
- I had my first serious relationship at the age of 16.
- I spent the summer after my freshman year of college working an 8am-5pm job. Then every summer after that.
- I have drank before turning 21.
- I spend an hour at least getting ready to start my day in the morning.
- I decide to work 20 hours a week while going to school, just because I want to.
- I only spend 45 minutes at the gym each day on average.
- I’ve already planned out my life and I’m only 20.
I’m not here to preach, as these are personal examples of things I’ve done or how decisions I’ve made throughout my lifetime can be judged by my time. There is a stigma about everything listed above, and that is a problem.
Your time is your own. Your time is also precious. How you choose to spend your time and live your life is completely up to you. We shouldn’t have to worry about “looking bad” in comparison to the norms of society if we are doing something that makes us happy.
What people might not realize from the outside looking in is your thought process, your intentions and goals, your heart. They don’t know you like you know yourself. So at the end of the day, should outside opinions ever affect your happiness or well-being? The answer is no.
If you want to get married young? Go ahead. If you don’t want to get married until you’re 40? Do that too. Want to spend two hours on your makeup in the mornings? I’m sure it will look great. Want to spend your free time watching Netflix instead of reading a book? Who am I to tell you no.
Always welcome advice and guidance. That is part of life and none of us are perfect. You will mess up plenty of times, but let it be on your watch. Understand that your time is yours, and there is no specific way in which you should spend your time. There are no rules or due dates, just live intentionally and purposefully, and stop looking at the clock with doubt.